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How friendly is your church?

Dan Harder

When my brother was a manager at a major fast food restaurant, frequently the restaurant would be “spot checked” by an outside person examining the quality of service, food and cleanliness. This meant that high standards had to be maintained at all times.

Recently I was a “spot check” visitor at a large church – a church that was virtually a shopping mall of diverse services designed to meet almost any perceived need. Between the two morning services, people bustled in the hallways collecting their children, catching up with friends and either making their way into the next service or slowly exiting the building. Our family of three waited for our hosts to meet us in front of the library. We waited and watched all the activity around us – but not one person came up to talk to us. During an earlier tour of the building with our hosts, only one person had given us a friendly welcome.

I also attended the evening service, which, ironically, was on care groups. During one of the presentations, the audience was exhorted to not leave the building without meeting at least one person they did not know. After the service, I sat in my seat and waited. People went in front of me, around me and behind me, but never approached me. One of the presenters, while cleaning up some equipment on the stage, saw me sitting there and had a mini-crisis of conscience. He put down his things, walked down the stairs and approached me. The man whom I had met in the morning was also there and a few minutes later came and joined us. He was the moderator of the church council. When I told him how friendly his church was, he hung his head and said, “We have a lot of work to do here.”

People of this conservative evangelical church may make excuses for not making contact with me – I was dressed in jeans top to bottom, wore a goatee and had an earring. I did not look like most of them. They had no way of knowing I was an ordained minister in that very denomination. If they had known I was coming, things might have been different. And that’s the point.

Churches need to be friendly to whoever comes through their doors – all the time. Having greeters is fine. Having helpful ushers is good. But everyone needs to be on the lookout for those new people who, if they are not welcomed, will either try out another church or never go to any church again because “Christians aren’t friendly.” If someone “spot checked” your church for friendliness, how would it rate? New people are checking out your church every Sunday – so welcome them!

Dan Harder is a recent graduate of Canadian Theological Seminary in Regina, Sask.

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Last modified May 17, 2000.

© 2000 Mennonite Brethren Herald.
Published by the Canadian Conference of MB Churches.
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