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A real Christmas gift

Peter A. Dyck

At this time of year we are all caught up in the annual “problem “ of what gifts to buy for each other. What gifts can you give your children that will remain with them into their adult life? The latest toys and games and even the most up-to-date designer clothes will be out of style soon. These gifts and gadgets sometimes just mask the emptiness that some children feel in their own homes.

Christmas can be a very difficult time for parents that are having serious problems relating to their children and/or each other. In such cases, gifts do not mean much anymore. The pain of marriage problems lingers on into the celebration of Christmas, denying the hope and love it is meant to bring.

At this very moment, some parents are heading away from each other. Problems, misunderstandings, addictions and a busy work schedule have resulted in very little quality time between dad and mom and between their children. The children may race around from one activity to another, trying to find people they can relate to and be open with. They may sound happy, but down deep they feel insecure about what is happening. The only safe place they have known, their home, does not feel safe anymore. They become fearful, disruptive and disoriented. They don’t know what to do. They feel powerless and alone.

Dad and Mom, it is never too late. There are other ways to live. This Christmas, give your children the gift of your own vulnerability. Be open. Start over. Christmas is a time of new beginnings. This is an opportunity for you to give yourself, your time and your presence to your spouse and your children. It’s time you laughed again, and cried together. Be real. We all fail sometimes, but let’s learn from our failures.

God loves you and your children more than you will ever know. He will help you change your priorities so that you can give your children the best gift of all, yourself. You have far more to give than you think. The Christ, whom we celebrate at Christmas, wants to give Himself to your children through you. Listen to the angels who say, “Fear not, for I bring you good news of great joy!”

Peter A. Dyck is a family therapist in Edmonton, Alta. He and his wife Mary have two children and four grandchildren.

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Last modified December 9, 1999.

© 1999 Mennonite Brethren Herald.
Published by the Canadian Conference of MB Churches.
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